(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Make up a song to yourself.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.