Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I have a phobia of incest

Run faster down hotel corridors.

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.