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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night
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-56
standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.
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-56
I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.
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-60
Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with
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-62
Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...
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-64
When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.
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-64
Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.
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-68
I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.
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-72
Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.
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-74
Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.
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-74
Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.
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-100
I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...
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-108
When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better
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-112
Run faster down hotel corridors.
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+49
eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with
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+31
.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.
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+29
accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep
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+23
Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.
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+23
looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...
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+21
sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection
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+19
That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.
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+13
Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.
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+13
I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)
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+11
When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out
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+9
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.