After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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Smoking in the shower.

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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listen to madonnas new album

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.