Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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I have a phobia of incest

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.