Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.