I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.