.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.