when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

I can only play a piano with my right hand

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

Smoking in the shower.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.