Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

I rehearse arguments in my head.

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.