Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.