RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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Only use the left earphone.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Sitting down in the shower

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.