When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

Justin Beiber is a woman

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.