try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.