log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I have a phobia of incest

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.