Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.