I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.