recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Ur mum

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.