Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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I piss in the bed every night

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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k. everyone

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When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

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Boinked my neighbor

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.