close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

I delete all notifications on my phone before i shut it off.

If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

Dramatically narrate everything I do in my head as I do it.

Say 'WED', 'NES' and 'DAY' slowly in your head when spelling Wednesday.

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

I have always belived that I invented calling Target " Tar- jhay"

Pretend that i don't care about my birthday when i actually can't wait to see what present people will get me and get terribly excited everytime someone text me

Write things in the air with my finger, and then erase the words with my hand.

Have a dream with horribly unfortunate events (like having an amputation or being in prison) waking up from said dream and saying something like, "Good thing that was a dream, don't know what I'd do if that was real"

Try having a conversation with your friends parents but keep saying yeah the whole time

Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

Math tests-doing all the work for a problem only to find out my answer is not any of the multiple choices.

I never look out the window at night because I'm afraid there will be an Alien staring at me when I move the curtains.

Peeing in the shower

I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

I stay vigilant while i shower in case killer/zombies come into my house..

Eat pizza backwards because the crust isn't as good as the cheese part and I want to get that over with.

Whenever I'm home alone, I dance and sing along to any commercial.

whenever im getting a haircut, i feel as if the barber can see my embarrassing and private thoughts.

mentally scolding yourself for thinking something dirty just in case the person you're thinking about can read your thoughts

When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.