I chew on anything plastic. I don't think there's a pen that I haven't chewed on or a plastic cap I haven't put in my mouth. It's a horrible habit but it feels so DAMN GOOD TO CHEW!

whenever im doing sumthing im not suppose to i feel like everybody knows what im doing

Look at the clock, then instantly forget what time it is and look again.

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse.

I approach balcony ledges with my feet firmly planted, just in case a random person decides to come pick me up and throw me off the balcony.

Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

I constantly talk to myself.

I click my teeth to music

When I have headphones in, I wonder if my swallowing is extremely loud for everyone else too.

think about all of the things you would do if you were the only person on earth

I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

I unlike Facebook pages if they spam my wall.

When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

When you tell yourself that this is the last page you'll read and end up reading three more.

before i go to sleep i must check the front door knob multiple times to make sure its locked

When nobody's home I blast the stereo and sing as loud as I can.

Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

Answering questions that weren't directed at me, then awkwardly playing it off like they were talking to you.

Smiling like an Idiot when you get a cute text

When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.