i cant fall asleep unless i suck my thumb...

thumb_up thumb_down -43

In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

I avoid closing my eyes in the shower in case ghosts/monsters/zombies get me.

thumb_up thumb_down +114

At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Always think good thoughts before I go to bed so that I have good dreams

thumb_up thumb_down +102

I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

thumb_up thumb_down +145

I vote thumb dlown the ones that i dong like

thumb_up thumb_down -179

After texting someone, check your phone repeatedly to see if they responded

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +177

Dramatically narrate everything I do in my head as I do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

Wonder why there are sites like this.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Pick my nose with my elbow, that way I keep my nails clean.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You remember something funny. You smile like an idiot. Everyone around thinks your weird for randomly smiling.

thumb_up thumb_down +179

close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

thumb_up thumb_down +139

Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

I talk excessively loud in public sometimes so people can hear my opinions. I'm just hoping someone's eavesdropping because I like the fact that they might agree with me and that they get to see a little bit of who I am. I don't even know these people.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

mentally scolding yourself for thinking something dirty just in case the person you're thinking about can read your thoughts

thumb_up thumb_down +129

Eat pizza backwards because the crust isn't as good as the cheese part and I want to get that over with.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

When I'm home alone I open random doors to make sure nobodys there

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.