Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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speak proper english

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.