Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

I never feel bored

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

Look at my poop before flushing

When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

check shower for murder then pee

I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Play with my own boobs for no reason

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.