Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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I never feel bored

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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Look at my poop before flushing

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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check shower for murder then pee

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.