Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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I don't read the terms of service.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Poo really loud

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.