sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

thumb_up thumb_down -20

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

thumb_up thumb_down -24

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Play as both sides on fifa

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

thumb_up thumb_down -40

If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Look at my poo before I flush it.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

thumb_up thumb_down -54

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

thumb_up thumb_down -62

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.