- Things You Think Only You Do

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

pull out a flies wings and let it go

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

I hate being called "buddy".

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.