I piss in the bed every night

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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I push the door open with my stomach

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.