google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

Take off the ends of the banana (

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

I piss in the bed every night

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

Mayada stupid

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.