Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.