Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.