When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

I think about other women when having sex

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.