Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I no longer trust any of my local news because they appear to have an agenda

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.