When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Go to the same website two days in a row and then never again after that

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.