When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

Does anyone else look at people when there talking and then randomly get in on there conversation.

When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.