I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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I like to eat the crust on pizzas

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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wonder who wrote these things

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I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

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Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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put the volume on the TV as an even number, and feeling uncomfortable if it's on an odd number

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.