I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Get a mini heart attack when your rocking on your chair and you nearly fall off

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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Do sex sensations feel exactly the same for the opposite sex.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

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really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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wonder who wrote these things

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.