Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

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While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.

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i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Think you looked good the whole day, then come home and realize you were a hot mess and nobody told you

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Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

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sniff my armpit when somebody says someone stinks and shouts NOT ME lol

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

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when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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I use the power-stance sometimes when I poop. It's where you completely remove one leg from your pants and put the shoe back on. Your legs can go further apart.

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I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

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I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

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Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

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Looking around in disgust at your messy room and then doing nothing about it.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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When I'm about to go to the bathroom, I think of a million things that I have to do and try to do them all before I pee my pants.

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.