I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

When I'm hungry I look in the fridge, but there's nothing good to eat so I shut the door and walk away. Then I look in the fridge again 10 seconds later in the hope that new food has arrived Robbie

Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

I hold my breath in elevators

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".

I think about life problems in the shower

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.