Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

Attempting to start phychic conversations with people in public

im going to kill that person and get away with it

When I'm in a hurry I brush my teeth while peeing because I think it saves time.

Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

If I hear a noise, it obviously means there is a monster somewhere in/near my bedroom and the sheets will protect me as long as they cover up to my chin.

Hate when you finish a cup of pudding or something like that and you don’t want to get up to put the spoon in the sink so you just leave it sitting in the cup but the spoon is too tall for the cup and it falls over.

I think SpongeBob and Patrick are rude, inconsiderate a_holes. ... That's right, I'm an adult and I watch SpongeBob. lol

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

when i have to go down stairs at night, i have to sprint up the stairs in case there are ghosts/monsters never dangle my feet over the bed in case something tickles/touches them

I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

It's hot but I still have on covers

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.