I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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use the shower water running of my arms and hands to shoot off random hairs inside the shower

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Imagining yourself in the "Last Supper" scene. (in Jesus's spot matter of fact)

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

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When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

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When I die during an online game I try to cram as much food and drink in my mouth as I can before I respawn. If I have no food I roll all over the bed.

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If I hear a noise, it obviously means there is a monster somewhere in/near my bedroom and the sheets will protect me as long as they cover up to my chin.

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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Open the fridge every 15 minutes, to see if there is anything new to eat.

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I eat ass

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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Wheneveri brush my teeth, I make a snarling face.

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when i have to go down stairs at night, i have to sprint up the stairs in case there are ghosts/monsters never dangle my feet over the bed in case something tickles/touches them

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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I talk to my pet when no one is home.

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.