See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

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Go on this site to feel normal.

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Flush the toilet before peeing to see if I can accomplish peeing before the water flushes away. :)

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Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

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pinch your nostrils in between your finger and thumb and rub them back and forth in order to smell the inside of your nose.

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I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

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Think you're breathing way too loud when your headphones are turned up

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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Do math in ur head at night to help you fall asleep.

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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Am I the only one that thinks of things, and force yourself to not to think about it, then you hear people laugh or go "OHHHH" so you think that you said your thoughts out loud and everyone heard?

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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Trace the letters on the front of your textbooks with your finger.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.