Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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Clenching my fists, imagining I have wolverine claws coming out of my knuckles

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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Try having a conversation with your friends parents but keep saying yeah the whole time

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When I wear a backpack I constantly check to make sure all the pockets are zipped

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.