Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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ASMR

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

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I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.

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When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.

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People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

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I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.

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When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.