disgusted by people that are obsessed with poo and pee

I buy books and never read them and get mad at myself for doing so.

Look at a friend and realize that you have forgotten their name...

I always cry when I pray.

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

Eat goldfish and cheez-its salt side down.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Smiling like an Idiot when you get a cute text

Pretending you're in a tribute band when you listen to a song.

Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

Before I sing in the car, I always have to make sure I haven’t accidently butt-dialed anyone. –Ikka

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.