when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

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I wonder to myself if other people see exactly the same things as me.

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I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

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RAPE CHILDREN

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When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

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i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

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Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

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Someone asks a question and you say "what?" and then answer them because you actually heard but didn't realize it.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.