when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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I like to poo while smoking.

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Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

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Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/

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Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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I have tons of imaginary conversations in my head with people I know, but they never happen. It's worse when something funny happens in the imaginary conversation and I laugh to myself, and if someone notices I can't even say that I was remembering something because I wasn't, it had never happened...

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check shower for murder then pee

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

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I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

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think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

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fall asleep in the shower.

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.