DIY LOL
I AM DISAPPOINT
Objectiface
Scumbag Steve
ffuuu
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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up
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-51
Whenever I do something I want to tell someone about, I have to whisper it to myself before I tell them.
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-58
If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.
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+73
Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.
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-32
I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.
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+10
when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble
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-49
I eat ass
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-58
masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes
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-33
Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.
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-46
I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.
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-15
stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.
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-20
Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.
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-44
Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.
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-49
oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices
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-97
Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.
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-21
I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.
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-22
My goal is to get as much as possible thumbs down at this post.
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-34
it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill
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+7
Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.
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-55
The longer it takes me to find the light switch in the dark the more frantic and terrified I become.
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+323
I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol
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-69
Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.
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-102
When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.
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-26
I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.
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-88
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.