jack off

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daydream/pretend i'm in a story. pretend to be a new person in a movie where all the cool main characters are my friends, add to the movie with my own story and add twists and make it my own.

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Realising that there are ASSHOLES posting dumb shit on this site.

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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when two pictures look very similar, i go back and forth between them so it looks like they're moving

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When I'm bored I think of what it would be like to be a women.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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being super bored at school

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I purposely try to burp as loud as I can in public. –Ikka.

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I approach balcony ledges with my feet firmly planted, just in case a random person decides to come pick me up and throw me off the balcony.

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.