I brush my teeth with the tap on because it sounds weird brushing in silence.

Pee sitting down so I dont have to aim

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

At restaurants, eat my food in sections. Usually leafy greens, french fries, then steak/ whatever meat.

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

I don't read the terms of service.

Act as if you don't notice her, but you really are dying to take another look at her.

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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stare at a word and try to sound it out backwards to see if it spells something backwards.

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

On the train, try and mathematically make (add,subtract,multiply,divide etc.) the carriage number to get to ten

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.