You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

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Whenever I order a lot of food at a fast food place for myself, I order an extra drink just so they think it's for two people.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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must have the tv volume set to an even number or feel weird

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When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".

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When no one's looking, I run up stairs on hands and feet.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

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I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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after ive done something, or experienced something. when i think back on the days events, i think to myself. "i think ive done that before somewere". i must have a boring existance. its always de ja vu with me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.