I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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Hate when you finish a cup of pudding or something like that and you don’t want to get up to put the spoon in the sink so you just leave it sitting in the cup but the spoon is too tall for the cup and it falls over.

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One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

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*Sees bug on wall while taking shower* *Splashes with shower water* *Bug slides down wall* >_

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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Find it impossible to get rid of the itch on the bottom of my feet or my palms when they're itchy

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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Wrap up inside a sleeping bag and slide down the steps.

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When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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When on long car rides, I always look out the window and imagine a little man running alongside the car.

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Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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when someone mispronounces something I say the correct pronunciation quietly under my breath so it doesn't bother me

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Whenever I'm home alone, I listen to songs from my culture like Ella Ella, Taboo, or Sexy Robotica by Don Omar or other fun dancing songs, super loud and dance crazy and sing along as loud as I can. Any one else?

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.