I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

incognito mode on google chrome

It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

Always think good thoughts before I go to bed so that I have good dreams

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

Get random feelings of nausea and/or dizziness for no apparent reason.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.