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When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"
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-50
Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.
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-62
When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis
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-51
Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.
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-8
get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can
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-38
Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.
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-29
smoke marijuana
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-44
Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <
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-46
I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.
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+279
Try stick to something but fail in the end
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+7
When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.
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+4
run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can
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+70
Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.
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-56
If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming
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-2
Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.
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-48
When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...
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-7
I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers
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-8
I sometimes wonder if im the only living person on earth and everyone else is just there in order to affect my existance -Henry
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+1,415
I randomly hold my boobs in my room.
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-29
I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is
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-11
While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.
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+2,116
I pass by closed doors quickly and at least as far away as the door seems like it can open, because I always feel like someone's going to burst out, hitting me in the face with the door.
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+37
Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz
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-118
Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.
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-28
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.