When no one's looking, I run up stairs on hands and feet.

When I'm walking I pretend that I'm staying in the same place and moving the world beneath me.

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

smoke marijuana

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I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

Try stick to something but fail in the end

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

I sometimes wonder if im the only living person on earth and everyone else is just there in order to affect my existance -Henry

I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.