Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.