when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

thumb_up thumb_down +11

close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Pee in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

thumb_up thumb_down -23

When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I have to keep reading website pages until I reached 5, 10, 15 etc. When I get close to my age though, I can finish there.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

thumb_up thumb_down -49

whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

thumb_up thumb_down -51

read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.