When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

Pretend animals talk to you!

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

Try to see nipples through body paint.

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

Watch the same movies over and over

Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.