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Parent Failure
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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.
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+56
I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche
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+8
I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?
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+6
I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do
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+2
Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!
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-2
Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.
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-2
Having gay sex
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-10
Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.
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-12
When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.
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-14
freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this
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-16
think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married
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-18
when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.
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-18
Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.
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-20
When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.
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-22
When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.
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-26
when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.
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-26
when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window
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-28
When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.
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-30
I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.
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-32
I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.
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-32
I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.
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-34
Eating chicken at KFC.
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-36
sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.
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-36
After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.
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-36
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.