Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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Trace the letters on the front of your textbooks with your finger.

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play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

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Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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Boinked my neighbor

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.