Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.