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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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reading thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com at the office when you're supposed to be working then checking that the guy next to you doesn't notice. and quickly clicking a different tab when someone is walking or standing nearby.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.