Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Boinked my neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

thumb_up thumb_down -67

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

thumb_up thumb_down -75

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -99

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

thumb_up thumb_down +16

thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I think about other women when having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.