I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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check shower for murder then pee

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i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

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Try to talk to my pet telepathically. - sky

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Set Fire to the Rain

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.