I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.