really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.