I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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sitting in your room at night and making imagineary monters or random figures out of things in your room.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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call someone by a siblings name.

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Imagining yourself in the "Last Supper" scene. (in Jesus's spot matter of fact)

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.