Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

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when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

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Time a song on my MP3 player to be the soundtrack to something I'm about to do, especially in public places.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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never push to hard on the railing of a tall building, just in case its loose and you end up falling off.

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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Play Minecraft

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.