Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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Whenever I cross the road with someone I try to walk faster then them just in case a car comes it won't drive me over.

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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Pee in the shower

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.