sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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While in the "try on" rooms of a clothing store, check myself out in the massive, wall mirror that's in there... and/or get nervous that someone is watching me.

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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I brush my teeth while im in the shower

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.