smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

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fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

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When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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At the store then mom leaves to get something then u start panicking as the cashier begins paying and you thing she will charge yo already

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

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In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

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When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

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Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

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always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Imagine the perfect video game and wonder why nobody made it yet.

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.