I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Sometimes I forget that there are spiders in my bedroom, so after I've seen one I can't sleep for several days for fear that they'll eat me if I do. Then I forget about them again and thus the cycle starts.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I type a comment here and secretly feel special

thumb_up thumb_down +27

If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Think of a song, tv show, or movie for a brief moment. Hear/see it the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I sleep in my underpants every single night

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

On YouTube , I try to find the clearest music

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I have walked into a sliding glass door

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.