Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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when I'm walking i always try to step over the cracks with the same foot every time

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

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I tend to stand in front of mirrors and stare at myself to the point of my face changing to a more evil look than normal and freaking myself out, and forcing myself to either look away, or down.

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Your mom

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Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

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Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

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sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When drunk, I often grab something, lift it into the air, and yell "I GOT THE POWER!" just in case it turns me into He-Man.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.