(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

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Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

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Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

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Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

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Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

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When you're in your late teens, you blare the car stereo when driving near girls that are walking. When you grow up, you turn the radio down in fear that you look like a tool bag.

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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dream about the most amazing guy/girl that you have a relationship with and hope it comes true

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On YouTube when I go to like a comment or a video. I click the Like button 2 or 3 times just to make sure it went through.

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Things I did when I was little: Slowly close the fridge door to see the light go out before it is closed all of the way. Put the light switch in between "OFF" and "ON". Walked in to a room and forgot why, walked out then remembered. (STILL DO!) Drew the sun in the corner of the paper. Put a flashlight in your mouth to see yourself, "blush".

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Try to pee on the toilet-paper in the toilet so it rips in half

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After eating a lot of junk food begin to fear that i'm going to get diabetes.

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scream after your in the ooh part of achooh when you sneeze.

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.